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The Premier League table: healthy reading for United, depressing for Everton.
Everton 0-3 Manchester UnitedThe story of the boos. Everton couldn’t lift themselves to kick against the perceived injustices and must now look to next week at the City Ground as their relegation fight continues. United go to Galatasaray in good cheer. They hardly dazzled but Alejandro Garnacho’s opening goal certainly did.
90+3 min: Death throes stuff now from Everton. Goodison tiers emptying. Long old season ahead. This was a game most expected them to lift themselves for.
Harrison meanwhile can’t direct the ball goalward when it is bouncing around the United box.
90+1 min: Chermiti – dressing-room nickname Walter – smashes the ball wide and Onana was nowhere near it. Now some half-hearted boos as Gueye is booked.
90 min: Everton sub, Doucoure on, Dobbin on.
Stephen Carr gets in touch: “Afternoon John. Amidst all the hullabaloo, Everton seem to have overlooked the need to actually play well. United are two goals up without really having to do anything. It’s as if Everton thought they’d win on pure emotion alone.”
Six minutes are added on.
89 min: United might get a fourth but Tarkowski, almost the last man, stops Bruno and Rashford linking up.
87 min: Adam Roberts gets in touch: “First, Rashford – under no pressure – simply passes it to an Everton player who was a good 10 yards away from any United player; and Pickford blasts the ball into touch, 10 yards behind the (presumably) intended target, then seemed to blame someone else.
“Incidentally, a United player (Garnacho?) did Ashly Young a huge favour after the penalty decision by stopping him going to shout at the referee which surely would have led to his richly deserved second yellow.’
Still, there was the Garnacho goal, right?
86 min: Patterson finds space on the overlap but overruns it, with Onana running out to claim the ball. That’s happened too often in promising positions for Everton.
84 min: Martial is off, and on comes Hannibal. Erik Ten Hag’s plan has come together.
82 min: Calvert-Lewin departs, at least his fitness is holding up, and on comes Chermitti. The home groans continue as United begin to play the ball around in a fashion they could not manage during a highly uncomfortable first half.
81 min: Goodison is beginning to empty a little but many may be staying to air their grievances.
78 min: The sound now is of United fans taunting the Evertonians, and regrettably, it’s the poverty chanting they indulge in. No need. It’s 2023. Grow up. Fight the common enemy. And so on.
77 min: Off goes Shaw for United. He’s played well. Wan-Bissaka on, and Dalot swaps flanks.
76 min: This time, the boos are half-hearted. It’s the United fans we hear now.
Goal! Everton 0-3 Manchester United (Martial, 75)United pass the ball round neatly and then Fernandes sends Martial away, with Pickford charging out. The Frenchman is cool, and slots home.
Manchester United’s Anthony Martial scores their third goal past Everton’s Jordan Pickford. Photograph: Molly Darlington/Reuters74 min: Mainoo will be missed by United, and Garnacho will be too.
72 min: Two United subs: off go Mainoo and Garnacho, on come Ambrabat and Pellstri.
Two Everton subs: Young and McNeil off, Danjuma and Patterson on.
71 min: Close for United. Lindelof sends Rashford away, and the cross back across almost finds Garnacho, whose volley hits the sidenetting. Where was Martial?
70 min: Dalot makes a fine block – with his rear end – as Doucoure shapes to shoot. There’s some aggro in the box between Onana and Branthwaite, who is pushing and shoving away. United, though, clear their lines.
69 min: Everton corner, and Onana punches the ball up and claims. He was a bit lucky, to say the least.
69 min: David Wall gets in touch: “Is even the referee showing a bit of solidarity here with Everton in protest at their points penalty? Both Doucoure and Young would normally have received second yellow cards for persistent fouling and the trip for the penalty respectively. Unfortunately for Everton it looks as though the guys at Stockley Park aren’t in on the conspiracy to level things up for them. Howard Webb needs to improve communication within the different areas at the PGMOL.”
68 min: Stephen Winstanley gets in touch: “If United are so bad (and they are a shadow of what they should be given poor form and as bad an injury list as any other team out there) and if the result today stands what does it say about the league when they will be just 6 points off the top of the table.”
It’s a fair point. Nobody has been too outstanding this season and it’s been really good for that reason.
66 min: Onana is grateful when Maguire’s pressure on Calvert-Lewin means the striker can only deflect the ball into his path.
64 min: Mainoo plays a fine ball out wide, and then Dalot is in space, he lays up Garnacho whose technique fails him this time. Everton are opening up.
62 min: Howls of outrage and boos as Rashford sets off on a run on the counter. More boos as United win a corner. You get the picture. Boos as Fernandes plays a ball crossfield. And another corner is won.
61 min: Mykolenko swings and scrapes a shot wide of goal.
59 min: Samuel Campbell gets in touch: “This is quite the performance by Dyche, the Everton players and the Everton fans. Pretending that every correct decision against them is somehow part of some giant conspiracy of corruption against them. It is quite ridiculous!”
Thing is, Sam, everyone behaves like this in football. And in life, too.
58 min: Gueye finds space, turns and shoots. It’s flying in but what a save from Onana! The keeper then punches the corner clear. Boos as Tarkowski and Maguire tussle in the box and nothing is given.
57 min: Booooooooooooooo!!!!
Goal! Everton 0-2 Manchester United (Rashford, 56 pen)Fernandes gives the ball to Rashford, who steps up and dithers and shimmies and blasts it beyond Pickford. A pearler…..booooooooooooooo!
Rashford buries it. Photograph: Magi Haroun/ShutterstockPenalty to Manchester United!52 min: Martial booked for simulation!….Fernandes’s pass goes through and that’s ruled a dive when it looks like a clear penalty. Young pleaded innocence and none too convincingly. Referee Brooks is called across to look. Though why he didn’t give it in the first place is anyone’s guess. Martial’s booking is cancelled. The penalty is given. Will Young be booked? Seems not.
Fans lambast referee John Brooks as he refers to the on-field VAR screen. Photograph: Michael Regan/Getty Images50 min: United look a little less rushed, Everton less harried. But then Calvert-Lewin brings the ball down and then Maguire robs Mykolenko to howls.
49 min: Still a neat undertow of boos. There will be some fans whose faces get stuck like that in the winter cold, their lips chapped from being shaped like that for 90 minutes.
47 min: McTominay thwacks the ball wide, advantage being played after both Garnacho and Fernandes are fouled.
46 min: The second half is here, and we begin with boos, and some more good work from the Sky sound mixer. Mainoo starts off an attack with a canter through midfield. Promising signs. Stockport’s next great star, to follow Phil Foden and Adam Le Fondre?
Phil Gillibrand: “I don’t want to get pedantic, but I’m going to anyway. A bicycle kick (with the right foot) involves getting the other foot (left) high first, then using the momentum from the sisoor (or cycling) motion to bring the right foot up onto the ball. Klinsmann’s goal, while an exceptional overhead kick, wasn’t a bicycle kick. Rooney’s was. Was Garnacho’s? I haven’t seen it.”
Overhead kicks, your selections.
Marco Van Basten
Rivaldo
CristianoKári Tulinius gets in touch: “This is one of the most extraordinary bicycle kick goal I have seen. It’s up there with Gareth Bale’s in the champions league final, Zlatan’s against England, and Jürgen Klinsmann’s for VfB Stuttgart, a familiar sight in Bundesliga best ever compilations.”
Half-time reading:
Half-time: Everton 0-1 Manchester UnitedEverton have been full of spirit and the better team, galvanised by injustice and the realisation United can be got at. And yet, Garnacho’s goal separates the teams. It was an absolute beauty. The teams leave the field to boos, just as they entered.
45+2 min: Young and Garnacho clash once more, the Everton man already on a booking. Back in defence, Rashford comes back to clear up. More boos, Fernandes sweeps away McNeil and escapes being penalised.
45 min: Two minutes are added on. The boos are still audible but not quite as loud.
43 min: Dalot’s cross finds Anthont Martial, previously a passenger, offside. At the other end, Doucoure is soon enough guilty of the same technical offence.
41 min: More Everton pressure. Ashley Young’s cross is a belter and Calvert-Lewin heads over. And then Gueye gets the chance to shoot after the ball is slipped inside from Calvert-Lewin. They might hit the target soon.
39 min: Simon McMahon gets in touch: “Hi John. Mitchell van der Gaag spent a couple of seasons as a player with Motherwell in the mid 90s. If nothing else, it means he should at least be already familiar with the feeling of mid table mediocrity, while the big boys fight it out at the top.”
38 min: Mainoo takes the ball forward, exchanges passes with Rashford but gets a cross cut out. He’s played very well, living up to his billing. The same cannot be said of Rashford, who next loses the ball by seeming to trip over it
36 min: Just as Garnacho launches a United attack at last, he overdoes it and the ball is soon enough back with Onana. There is relief when Shaw is fouled by Doucoure. Everton on the rampage. Doucoure’s not too many fouls off another booking.
34 min: Mainoo blocks a McNeil shot. United have been all over the show, a mirror of their many dismal displays this season.
33 min: A golden chance for Doucoure but he…misses. Oh Everton.
Everton’s Abdoulaye Doucoure reacts after missing a chance to score. Photograph: Jason Cairnduff/Action Images/Reuters32 min: This is all Everton now. They must score soon. United have to make two saves, with Mainoo the hero for the second. Calvert-Lewin’s shot is saved by Onana then Mainoo slides to stop Harrison scoring the rebound.
31 min: Good defending from Mainoo but it’s an Everton corner he concedes. And Garner takes, and it’s a free header for Calvert-Lewin, but straight down Onana’s throat.
29 min: Booooo. Referee Brooks books Doucoure for dissent after the Everton player complains that Garnacho has kicked the ball away. Garnacho escapes censure.